Life is an endless Developmental process. We all have unique Abilities and Disabilities. The Day we choose Awareness instead of ignorance, is the DAY we start to see everyone as equal. Gary Spears, DSP



Friday, October 31, 2008

Caden's check up

Caden had his 3 year old physical today.. He weighs 35.6 lbs (75th percentile) and is 40 inches tall (90th percentile) obvioulsy he is growing physically ok - still working on all the other problems though. All in all it was a good visit. He got his flu shot, and his Hep. A shot, and took them like a champ, no tears, just a quiet little -"ouch!" That's my strong little boy!!

Times change us

I was sitting here just thinking about this great group of "friends" that I have. Then I started thinking about where they came from. Caden. Really it was Caden who has formed me into what I am right this very second. Caden and all of his disabilities-and all of his quirks. It took me a long time to understand that I am NOT the reason he is the way he is. I remember asking or thinking if I did something wrong, or if my being sick and not "emotionally" bonded is why he is who he is. It's not. But it's easier to blame then face.

After Caden was born, I suffered very severe postpartum depression. Everyone by now knows this. I was out of work because of this for 5 months. Looking back now, this prepared me for our (Caden's) future. If it wasn't for Caden's birth and my subsequent PPD, I wouldn't have the TONS of great Friends that I have today. The have seem me when I was at my lowest and brought me back up the top, all with out judging. Funny too, because Most of my friends that knew me before my PPD, really aren't Friends anymore (I say most because I DO still have 1 or 2 who I love dearly and WILL always be my friends for life)Funny how people change when you get sick. More importantly is how you learn what real friendship is. I bonded with these people over a computer-an oline support group. They had NO idea what I looked like, or what I did. What my family was like or my thoughts. BUT they cared about ME. and they still DO! They are still such an inspiration to me. It's so amazing the way we can get tied to such wonderful people. I never would have met such amazing women had it not been for Caden. Had it not been for my PPD. I had the pleasure of having one of them fly across the country (from CA to NY) with her family to meet ME, and spend their family vacation, on vacation with MY family. What kind of friendship is better then that?? Especially when before that, you never met face to face? Everything happens for a reason.

My PPD has helped me to deal with so many different situations over time, most recently of course, back to Caden. Again stemming from Caden's disabilities, I've made EVEN more friends. Friends that I've become very close with and others that have been a part of our family, through Caden, that will always be in our families contacts & hearts. These are all people that I didn't pick myself. They were handed to me in both instances and I took it and ran. I couldn't have asked for a better intervention.

Over the past 3 years, we've been though severe PPD, mild PPD, 2 C-Sections (obviously) Kym's back surgery (all while nursing a newborn mind you), Mike's Eye surgery's & Both Caden & Colin's surgery's. Both of us have been out of work multiple times for long periods of time for medical reasons. Mike's heart problems and subsequent hospital stay leading up to anxiety (wonder why huh?) we've been though financial hardship and overcome them (who hasn't??) and even more importantly Caden's autism. I've delt with the very unexpected death of one of my lifelong best friends, as well as the horrid diagnosis of Les's cancer last Janurary and fast progress leading to his passing this past June, just one day shy of his marriage to my mom. It's alot for any family to go though. We have - in a short period of time. I won't say it was smooth, nor is it now. there's been yelling and fighting, tears and sorrow, but that all just makes us stronger and better able to handle what comes our way.

I wonder if 4 years ago this would have been as normal to us as it is now?I think not.

Time changes us.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Cleaning out pumpkins


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We decided that since it's the middle of the week and we are VERY strapped for time before Halloween very quickly arrives on Friday, that we would clean out the pumpkins tonight and crave tomorrow night. Caden is obviously showing HUGE HUGE progress with his senses, since he willing stuck his arm right down in that pumpkin and pulled it's insides gladly out! GO CADEN! More tomorrow!

Christmas List Updated

I updated some of the christmas lists today, just in case anyone is still pondering gifts. I'll probably update them quite often from here on out as I think of things or as things are bought.

Monday, October 27, 2008

We lost a monkey...

This is very very tragic. Caden didn't have it when he got home from school, and he didn't have it at school either, we only know this because his teacher wrote a note home saying that Caden missed monkey all day long. Ugh. He came home looking and looking and looking. Yes we have 4 other ones, but this one is the original. His first one ever from when he was a baby. It just wont' be the same. We called Michelle, who said it got on the bus with him today. I called the terminal (of course I have my resources at my fingertips!) and they double checked the bus for me, no sign of monkey..... not good.

Bye Bye Monkey (#1) we'll miss you! *sniff * sniff *

This is what happens when a certain someone doesn't take a nap as suggested.


He fell asleep about 6:30 and stayed asleep. Tonight as I type this, Colin i guess didn't nap today either. I nursed him at 6:15 and he's been sleeping ever since as well. Only scary thing about that is something tells me he'll wake up at 10 tonight and be all refreshed thinking its afternoon time!

Happy Anniversary to us!

Mike and I had our 5 year wedding anniversary this past Saturday, October 25th. The weather was exactly the same as the day we got married. rainy. For those of you that were at our wedding, I am sure that rain is something you'll never forget, especially the bridal party, who had it coming down from all directions, as well as the Laidlaw table & quikrete table who actually had to get MOVED because the rain was pouring down the chandeliers! Still the BEST day of my life. I wouldn't change one minute of it. :-) Mike & I went to the Melting Pot for dinner. We had a really good time and highly suggest everyone try the "fondue" experience at least once! The chocolate was AMAZING! the cheese and meats good too. I can't wait until someday we can go again!


The Melting pot, fondue pot before food (and our yummy drinks)
The cheese fondue
Our meats cooking in the Mojo cooking style
The snicker chocolate fondue- this was unbelievable.. I tasted it all night long!
Packing up getting ready to leave- we got an anniversary card, balloon bouquet & our picture taken and framed as well as a melting pot chocolate bar to melt later as part of our anniversary package.

Ever try to walk with a sleep sack on?


Colin has it mastered.. not only can he walk with it on, he can RUN! :-)

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Mike's Corner


" Lets go Buffalo Bills"
Monday night football in Buffalo... "Lets go Buffalo"
Super bowl here we come ?

Caden good job going to School.

Courtney keep up the good grades... Report card coming soon...

Colin stop getting into everything you little devil... "Love you kid"

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Teaching the boys to Share


Need I say more? How cute is that :-)

First Day Pictures as promised.

So obviously I still don't know how to make sure my pictures upload in the correct order becuase these are ALL OVER THE PLACE! Try to follow along the best you can! Sorry about that. Upabove, Caden was ready to leave before 8:00!
Watching Sissy get on the bus to take her to school at 7:30
High 5ing Courtney for his first day, he was so excited!
Waking up
I hated to get him up.. poor kid was out cold.

Caden's First Student bus (supporting Mommy's company! :-)
He was NOT happy about the car seat, and I don't know why since he's never had an opportunity to NOT sit in one. hum...
Mommy and Caden waiting... Mind you it was snowing earlier that morning. It was only 34 out and we had been waiting for almost 30 minutes.. Can you say COLD??- notice baby Monkey in his hand.. he kept it with him ALL day long, that's Caden. We were lucky we convinced him to leave the other 6 swaddled in blankie at home. School is working with us as well to get away from the stupid pacifier. I hate that thing, but is all a sensory thing with him...
Waiting.... (with monkey)
Caden's backpack.

Courtney's 5 Week report.

We got in the mail today Courtney 5 week progress report from school. I am SO proud of her. She has come such a long way from last school year. If she keeps up these grades for the next 5 weeks, she for sure will make the honor roll for the first time EVER, or even the merit roll would be great. She is super excited too. Her grades are as follows:

English- 93
Social Studies- 100!!
Music- 96
Math 97 (up from a 30- yes 30 last school year!)
Science- 95
Chorus- 100
Math AIS (special help class) Satisfactory!

She as well as us are super proud of her!! Yeah Courtney!

My personal opinion.. I still think that 5th grade was too young for middle school, to much of an adjustment for a then 10 year old. 6th grade obviously proving better and more adjusted to Middle school.

Caden's First day of Center based theraputic Preschool

It went pretty good. He was so excited about going to school and riding the bus. We watched Courtney get on the bus this morning, so he knew what to expect today. He was ready with his jacket and book bag on by 7:55- we didn’t have to be outside until 8:25-, then the bus didn’t come until 8:57- mind you it is 31 today and it was snowing earlier. It’s freezing here. And he starts school at 9.. So we had a bit of a cold wait.

OH well. His driver Bill was really nice, he reminds me of a little leprechaun- The bus aide was a bit weird. And She thought he didn’t need a car seat, so she had him all ready to sit in a regular seat, which Caden loved. Then I chimed in a said no, he’s only 3, and needs a car seat, so they had to move him, which really made him made. HE then started screaming and crying and that’s how we ended up leaving him. Poor kid, you could see him looking out that window screaming ma.... da…... My heart was breaking…..oh. I can’t wait to see how the ride home goes-to bad I am at work and won’t be there to greet him, Mike will be though. He’ll get used to it I know. It’s horrible to have to put your child on the bus for the first time and even worse when they are 3 and can’t talk!

Pictures coming later!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

CADEN STARTS SCHOOL TOMORROW!!

Wahoo!!! Just spreading my joy..... I'll post pictures of his first day tomorrow night!

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Walking to Target

This is what we look like on our walks to target/religion/the neighborhood,wherever! yes it was cold enough out that Colin needed a hat, Caden even said he was cold enough to put his hood up as we walked! I imagine that pushing the boys in the stroller has to be AT LEAST 100 lbs. the boys alone are over 60lbs, and if I remember the stoller is at least 50. What a great workout! I must admit, it's much easier pushing one kid in the single stoller!

Halloween Cut out Cookies!


I got the bright idea yesterday that we would make homemade cut out Halloween cookies, right down the homemade frosting. What is wrong with me?? LOL really we had a good time. Last night I made all the frosting and tinted it with the colors we'd use and put it away for today. This morning Courntey and & made the dough and cut them out and baked them. This evening after dinner we all sat down and got to work frosting and decorating them. Here's the pictures from our little project!


All cut out, just need baked!
Preping to start
Frost!
Caden liked the sprinkle part better, he didn't the like feel of the frosting.
Colin did frost his before he began to eat it.
Courtney playing with the purple frosting.
Caden eating one of his creations
Mommy's ghost
Pumpkin Cookie
Smile everyone!
Colin trying to pull the cookies closer
Caden has alot of fun with the frosting and sprinkles, can you tell?
Courtney with the Monkey mask on
the end products- our pretty Halloween cut out cookies!

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Visit to School

Yesterday Mike & I had to go to Caden's school to finish all of the intake paperwork, which was explanined to us before we even began signing that it was almost like buying a house, sign here and here and here, well you get the drift. Caden came along with us, so he was able to view his classroom and meet his teachers. His main teacher wasn't in that day, but the aide, Ms. Ginger was, and Caden took right too her. He played while we worked on paperwork and then we toured the school. Caden LOVED the gym the best (what kid doesn't) So Wednesday he offically starts. His teacher also got to see the "real" Caden having a tantrum and off in his "world" which is a good thing I guess, no honeymoon for him! :-) They have fabric draped over the lights to avoid the over stimulation from the brightness, which I thought was really great! We got all of his busing information as well, and he'll be picked up at 8:25 am and he'll be the 4 child on that bus. there is bus aide- thank goodness. I am not so much worried about him transitioning into the school part of this, but the busing really has me worked up. He is only 3!! How is he going to be when we have to leave him at the end of the driveway and get into a car seat on the school BUS??? I guess maybe it will be harder for me and mike then him huh? It always is right. Most parents don't have to worry about school and busing for 2 more years...... But this is what's best, I'll snap out of it.

Yesterday was also exactly one year since my back surgery... wow time sure does fly, the things that have happened in the past year... WOW, we won't get into everything, but reminiscing none the less! Too bad my leg is Still numb... but we always knew that there may have been too much damage done that feeling would never come back, I still have one year of hope left though!

Off to shower, the boys & I are taking our DAILY walk to Target, imagine that. :-)

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Caden's going to school!!

So we had our meeting with the school district this morning and Caden is giong to get put Center based!! YEAH!! We couldn't have gotten any better news. Originally the special Ed. director wanted to put him in an intergrated classroom, where there would be 12 children, 6 w/disabilities & 6 typical children from their head start program. After listening to our therapists and their concerns, the rep from gateway (where Caden will be going) thought he would be better in the center based class, with only the 6 disabled children and 2 teachers. he needs the one on one attention more and in order to help him transition into the structure easier, we thought this would be best for him. We can review the program again in May, and if Caden is showing more signs of progress rather then the current regression, we might be able to move into more integrated class, but we'll play that by ear. So my baby boy starts school next Wednesday the 22nd! He will take a school bus (a van with aide and they made notes of this behavior problems). So we are going to head to Target tonight and get Caden his first little back pack (awwww.....)

As for the logistics of the class. He will be getting his special ed needs taken care off all day while in school, which is a 5 day per week, full time class from 9-2. He'll get taken out of class from speech 3 times per week for 30 min. each & taken out 2 times per week for 30 min ea for Occupational Therapy. In addition to that, Caden will also receive group counseling 3 times per week for 30 minutes each. AND we will also get a school counselor to come to our home 2 times per month for 1 hour to help us as a family deal with his disabilities. This is beyond great for us and him as well!! We are hoping this program will do wonders for him. We also finally got an appt. with the autism clinic at Strong Memorial Hospital for Caden in May- 8 months away, but that's better then 12! He will be on the cancellation list as well, so maybe even sooner.

IN other news, I grabbed Colin in the stroller last night & walked over 2 miles! We walked Courtney to religion at church, which is just over a mile and then back home again. It took me only 1 hour and 15 minutes, not too bad, considering I was pushing a stroller as well. I'll think I'll walk to target tonight to grab that bag for Caden, Target is my new favorite place to WALK to (of course it's ALWAYS been my favorite place to begin with :-)

Monday, October 13, 2008

Colin's 15 month Check up

(sleeping in the car on the way to the doctor)

He is growing right on target. Colin is 32.5 inches long (85th percentile) and 25.8 lbs (60th percentile). What a big boy he growing up to be, catching up quickly with his brother who is only 36 inches tall! Poor little man had to get 4, yes 4 shots in those skinny little arms of his. One arm alone was tetanus & flu, he'll be a bit sore tomorrow!

All is good, although we still need to figure out a solution to the motion sickness issue, I think we'll have to move his car seat to another place and see if that helps..... hmmmm.. any suggestions welcome!

Believe in Angels

A drunk man in an Oldsmobile They said had run the light That caused the six-car pileup On 109 that night. When broken bodies lay about 'And blood was everywhere,' 'The sirens screamed out eulogies,' For death was in the air. 'A mother, trapped inside her car,' Was heard above the noise; Her plaintive plea near split the air: 'Oh, God, please spare my boys!' She fought to loose her pinned hands; 'She struggled to get free,' But mangled metal held her fast In grim captivity. Her frightened eyes then focused 'On where the back seat once had been,' But all she saw was broken glass and Two children's seats crushed in.
Her twins were nowhere to be seen; 'She did not hear them cry, ' 'And then she prayed they'd been thrown free, ' 'Oh, God, don't let them die! ' Then firemen came and cut her loose, ' 'But when they searched the back, ' 'They found therein no little boys, ' But the seat belts were intact. They thought the woman had gone mad 'And was traveling alone, ' 'But when they turned to question her, ' They discovered she was gone. Policemen saw her running wild And screaming above the noise 'In beseeching supplication, ' Please help me find my boys! They're four years old and wear blue shirts; 'Their jeans are blue to match.'' 'One cop spoke up, ''They're in my car, ' And they don't have a scratch. They said their daddy put them there 'And gave them each a cone, ' Then told them both to wait for Mom To come and take them home. 'I've searched the area high and low, ' But I can't find their dad. 'He must have fled the scene, ' 'I guess, and that is very bad.' 'The mother hugged the twins and said, ' 'While wiping at a tear, ' 'He could not flee the scene, you see, ' 'For he's been dead a year.' 'The cop just looked confused and asked, ' 'Now, how can that be true? ' 'The boys said, ''Mommy, Daddy came ' 'And left a kiss for you.'' ' He told us not to worry 'And that you would be all right, ' And then he put us in this car with 'The pretty, flashing light. ' 'We wanted him to stay with us, ' 'Because we miss him so, ' 'But Mommy, he just hugged us tight ' And said he had to go. He said someday we'd understand 'And told us not to fuss, ' 'And he said to tell you, Mommy, ' 'He's watching over us.' The mother knew without a doubt 'That what they spoke was true, ' 'For she recalled their dad's last words, ' ' I will watch over you.' The fire men's notes could not explain 'The twisted, mangled car, ' And how the three of them escaped Without a single scar. 'But on the cop's report was scribed, ' 'In print so very fine, ' An angel walked the beat tonight on Highway 109.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Kelkenburg Farm- Pumpkin Picking!



The horses walking us out

The pumpkin Patch


Family Picture
Another one on the wagon
Colin found his pumpkin
Waiting for the horses to come back for us
The pumpkins we picked
ON the wagon on the way back with the pumpkins
Caden sitting on the hay
The Pumpkin Patch! WOW! It was mommy's first time too! :)
Horses' made of corn stalks
Sheep climbing the windmill
The sheep & goats
Colin on his first pony ride
Yeah Colin!
Caden's first Pony Ride - he really has come along way

Pete the Pig- he was HUGE, I couldn't get his body in one shot, so I stuck with the snout.
The Baby pigs
Colin is an animal lover
The Pony
The farms sandbox and snack shack
Colin sleeping on the way home, holding an apple of course!
"When a loved one becomes a memory ~ That memory becomes a treasure"